Toddler tantrums can be frustrating for parents, especially if they happen in public. Temper tantrums are actually a normal part of toddlerhood.
It is not a sign of behavioral issues. They are just how your child’s immature brain processes emotions.
In toddlers, this emotional outbreak can lead to crying, thrashing, screaming fits, stomping, hitting the parents, falling down, kicking, biting, throwing things, or banging the head.
Young children usually start having temper tantrums around two years old. This toddlerhood period is often called the Terrible Twos. Well, I think this is not something new for moms!
Parents deal with this every day. We’ve been there! All of us were little kids many moons ago. The question is how do we handle this situation? The good news is there is something you can do about it.
We must remember, the way we treat our children today will either make them better or bitter. We are responsible for the person they going to be one day.
Let’s look at some tips on how to handle these situations.
Why Do Toddlers Have Tantrums?
Tantrums are among the biggest challenges of parenting. It’s hard to understand, hard to prevent, and even harder to respond to effectively when happening.
Anger, of course, is the No. 1 emotion that causes children to lose their heads and blow up! Think of it as the kid version of road rage says child and adolescent psychiatrist Steven Dickstein.
The child feels he or she deserves or needs something that is being deliberately withheld from them, like for example some sweets, cookies, or anything they believe they should have and is overwhelmed by their frustration and sense of injustice.
Another big trigger is anxiety, it causes kids to freak out! Whatever the cause, the first step is understanding the triggers and testing ways the environment can be changed to reduce the incidence of outbursts.
How do I deal With Toddler’s Temper Tantrums?
The Best Is To Stay Calm
If you respond with loud, angry outbursts, your child might imitate your behavior.
Shouting at a child to calm down is also likely to make things worse. Be consistent and calm in your approach.
Try to distract your child. Making a funny face might help. If you in the shop, show him a funny picture or toy, whatever you choose to do, just stay calm.
If your child is hitting or kicking someone or trying to run into the street, stop the behavior by holding him or her until he or she calms down. A tantrum-throwing toddler is not a spoiled brat.
When your child has calmed down, briefly discuss the reason why the behavior was inappropriate.
Then return to your usual activities. Whenever you say no to your baby, always explain to them why you feel that way.
Acknowledge your child’s strong feelings
Acknowledge your child’s feelings and wishes, even if they seem ridiculous, irrational, self-centered, or wrong. It’s a simple, profound way to reflect our child’s experience and inner self.
Acknowledge your child’s feelings is one of the most important things we can do as parents.
It helps our children to feel deeply understood for even their wildest fantasies and desires.
It also gives words to their feelings so they can help them sort through all these confusing feelings that they have, especially in the toddler years.
it’s very good for the child to just be able to feel acknowledged enough to move on and know that, okay, you understood what I wanted
Acknowledgments are one of the most powerful tools we have as parents and, it is a fact that they’re the key to your child’s heart. Before you tell your child something acknowledge his point of view first.
When kids are having emotional temper tantrums, they are telling us that they’re in deep emotional pain and they cannot cope on their own. In other words, they need our help.
Should You Punish Your Child For Throwing Tantrums?
Toddlers and tantrums go hand in hand, and it’s important to remember not to punish your little one for having one.
Your child is still learning how to interact in the world and doesn’t understand why they can’t have what they want at all times.
Children who have the permission to express emotion tend to be more socially aware and less angry.
Never punish your child in public. This is the worst thing you can ever do to a child. Their outbursts just get worse.
It’s easy to lose your temper when you have a screaming toddler out in public. You just want them to stop!
However, if you can maintain your composure and keep a calm, relaxed tone of voice, it could help pacify your child’s outburst more quickly.
Knowing how to discipline your toddler in public can be tricky, especially if you get embarrassed easily.
Ignoring is usually most effective for behaviors like whining, crying when nothing is physically wrong or hurting, and tantrums.
These misbehaviors are often done for attention. If parents, friends, family, or other caregivers consistently ignore these behaviors, they will eventually stop.
We know our babies, we also know what they like most. If you catch a tantrum at just the right time, you might just be able to distract your child completely.
Wherever you go, bring along their favorite toys or books, to calm them down. It is amazing how little children can change from crying to smiling! No need to punish your baby, all they need is love, and we have so many to offer them!
It takes a lot of patients and love to have a happy toddler! Don’t punish your child, by taking away toys, yelling at them, or spanking them when dealing with toddler tantrums. Here is the golden rule again, Stay calm!
On the other hand, when toddlers throwing these tantrums, never give in! Your toddler should think that throwing a tantrum will result in achieving his/her goal.
It might seem like these tantrums will last forever, but keep in mind that this type of behavior is only a stage that will pass. Good news indeed mom.
With a lot of patience and love, your child will gain a natural understanding of the appropriate way to communicate his/her emotions.
The End Result
In 2010, researchers at Duke University Medical School found that babies with very affectionate and attentive mothers grow up to be happier, more resilient, and less anxious adults.
Another 2013 study from UCLA found that unconditional love and affection from a parent can make children emotionally happier and less anxious.
This happens because their brain actually changes as a result of the affection.
Remember, from the moment you bring your baby home from the hospital, be sure to hold, touch, and give them all the love in the world. Spend many precious moments with them.
When you talk to them about what they did wrong, give them a hug at the end of the conversation to ensure them that, even if you are not pleased with their behavior, you still love them.
If your children hit their sister or brother, hug them and explain how hugging feels better than hitting.
In the end, you can sit back and be proud of yourself when you see the good in your older children.
Knowing they are going in the right direction, and that they will cope one day with their own children.
Are you planting what you want to reap in you and in your children?
Have you thought about the fact that the seeds you are planting in your children today will still be produced and harvested in generations to come?
You Planted the good seed into them. They will appreciate it one day.
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